0:00:36 - Speaker 3
Welcome back. Guess who's here? He's on my fucking podcast. Yeah, whatever, I'm not going to say five of your own. You have five of your own too. Well, let's do a little update first. This is obviously dropping late. We had some unforeseen circumstances. Listen, I'm showing us some grace. We've been through some shit.
0:01:15 - Speaker 4
Yeah, you folks don't know.
0:01:27 - Speaker 3
Unless you're a part of my Patreon or follow me on Twitter. I think I posted on Twitter about it. This podcast will have no video. Let me tell you why.
0:01:44 - Speaker 4
Yes, let's dig into that quickly, because we don't want to make this whole podcast about that.
0:01:49 - Speaker 3
Yeah, we don't want to talk about Krystine's insurance saga podcast, because this is bullshit. We were on a trip in California with our girls and we went to a Coldplay concert in San Diego one of the best, if not the best, shows I have ever seen in my life. They put on an amazing show and just the pictures and expressions and how our girls felt this experience made it worth everything that happened. We flew into San Diego, we drove up the coast to Monterey to visit one of our daughter's boyfriends who is in the Air Force, and we spent a few days there. On Monday we packed up, left the Airbnb, put all of our belongings in the back end of our Chrysler Pacifica rental vehicle.
0:02:42 - Speaker 4
A minivan.
0:02:43 - Speaker 3
A minivan and we went to the Apple Mothership and then decided hey, before we go to the airport, we have some time to kill. Let's go to Haight-Ashbury Area. Been there multiple times in a Kia Soul, might I add. Nothing happened, everything was fine. Not this time.
0:03:01 - Speaker 4
If you don't know what Haight-Ashbury is, it's the area where Jimi Hendrix and Grateful Dead, Janice Joplin, a lot of folks hung out there and way back in the 60s and all that. It's been a very chill area for decades, yeah.
0:03:15 - Speaker 3
And also if you don't live under a rock, like we did. The crime in San Francisco has escalated quite drastically since. I mean, we were just there in 2019 and apparently a lot has changed. 15 minutes after we parked, somebody pulled up in a car next to our rental van, busted out our back window and stole everything. Thankfully, I had been working in the car while we were driving, so my computer was in the front seat. However, we lost all of our GoPros. We lost my husband's computer, which was the computer that did.
Big boy, everything, not to be confused with our truck that we also call Big Boy. There is that, but we lost everything, a lot of our production, like external mics and all of the things.
0:03:59 - Speaker 4
Gopros, gopros, yep, we're bringing it all the way around to. That's why we don't have videos.
0:04:03 - Speaker 3
Yes, so that's why we don't have videos. So that's where we're at. We have been dealing with insurance. This happened on October 2nd and we've just now gotten a settlement. So things will be being replaced at a rapid pace, as rapidly as we can get them, so that we can get back on track. I just wanted to give you an update, right, because we leave in a couple of weeks.
Yes. So now we're on to Krystine's camping podcast. Briefly, we are chucking it in the Fuck It bucket and we are headed south. We are just going to throw caution to the wind and do the damn thing. So, as we are sitting here recording this today, it is my subby's last day for now of doing tile unless shit goes drastically south and we cannot survive, and not south in the good way.
0:04:49 - Speaker 4
Right, I mean absolute worst case scenario, if I have to go back to doing what I'm doing.
0:04:57 - Speaker 3
really, it's really not that bad, and I mean doing tile in the south is way better than doing tile in Minnesota in the winter.
0:05:03 - Speaker 4
However, I there are some other logistics at play, and that's just that.
0:05:09 - Speaker 3
I have confidence in our company, my company. No, I'm just kidding, I'm not even going to go there. No, it's mainly his. I just am along for the ride and sticking my nose and things a little bit more. So that is the update. That's the quick, though.
0:05:23 - Speaker 4
Yeah that was only five minutes. Yeah, that's not bad.
0:05:25 - Speaker 3
Yep, that's not terrible.
0:05:27 - Speaker 4
If anybody has any questions about anything specific, please reach out. We'd love to talk about the things.
0:05:31 - Speaker 3
Oh, and we've talked about it at ad nauseam for the last couple of weeks because it's been so frustrating Our girls have had. I mean, their settlement went very easy. It did create a little bit of a rift between them, so there's been some drama, but we're working through it. We will be doing a second ladies group, second ladies group, in October where you can bring your subby, your slave, whatever you want or whatever you lovingly refer to them as.
They can participate in that group. It's going to be just kind of a chat session about how October went, and even if you're not talking about October, we can just talk about the dynamic and chastity and how things are going and whatever.
0:06:12 - Speaker 4
So also we're actually talking in sort of that PBS talk show tone, because we're in a conference room at an apartment building and we don't want all of this to bleed out.
0:06:25 - Speaker 3
So if it sounds like we're talking quieter than normal, until I get excited, and then I'll probably start talking louder because my my amperage goes up as we get more excited. Any who to be fair.
0:06:38 - Speaker 4
I just want to add that please send us your stories, your October stories, so that we can read them in the final episode of October. We're going to read different, whatever stories you send us.
0:06:48 - Speaker 3
Yeah, week five Send us your October horror stories. Send us your October goals that you've, that you've succeeded, or wins that you've had in that month, or or losses, or learn all those things. Yes, we send those. We have to read them. Yes, I would love to, and obviously, if you send me an email, I will keep your name out. I will just say a listener, so it's all anonymous. So let's get into my favorite month of the year, which my cock cage was stolen, as was my key, so we are not participating in on October that was literally stolen from us.
And it's funny like I wish I could see somebody's face when they open it and see that cock cage. I mean, the cock cage was in one backpack and the key was in the other one, so you do that sort of thing, you open yourself up to whatever might happen on the other side.
I will say that I did put my vibrator that I had with on my insurance list with a picture, and, god damn it, I'm getting it back, as you should. Let's get into October topics, the first couple that we did. The first one was the history of Chastity, and I don't know if we covered this. There's different levels of Chastity the light, which is denial permission, medium, classic Chastity and heavy, longterm Chastity. I think they're all pretty self explanatory. I just kind of want to touch on them. Listen to those if you haven't. Yes, I would like to say, though, in our ladies group meeting this last week, this week we are talking about safety tips for male Chastity.
So, yeah, and the second, really important yeah, the second week of October we talked about kind of our story and the TSA story. So if you haven't heard that, that one was fun too. Safety tips First of all introduction when you're starting, like an introduction to Chastity. When you're starting Chastity you have to be prepared for, not that these are expensive, but it is probably. I mean you can get expensive Chastity devices.
0:08:41 - Speaker 4
You literally get what you pay for. Yes, well, there are ways of doing this. In an expensive way, for sure, right?
0:08:48 - Speaker 3
But be prepared to replace them, maybe more frequently than if you spend the four, three or $400 on a custom made one which and if you get the custom made one, yes, it's going to be but it's going to fit you the right way and it's going to be made of much better materials and stuff.
0:09:04 - Speaker 4
So, just like everything else, the price range, you know, really follows the quality, to be honest. But you can get it done that, you can get started at a pretty low price.
0:09:14 - Speaker 3
Yep, and Amazon is always. I mean you can get them on Amazon.
0:09:19 - Speaker 4
Etsy yes, for you can look for these things.
0:09:22 - Speaker 3
The next. That kind of leads into choosing the right device. It is very much trial and error and you have to really listen to your body Right, cause things change with temperature, with you know, when you're exercising it's going to be a different fit. So you need to try all activities and I think we've said this before on a podcast you maybe start out slow. I don't remember how we started. I think we went gangbusters and just threw it on and said we're not taking it off.
0:09:54 - Speaker 4
Well, we had. I mean we should listen to our own version of this but I'm just kind of reiterating. I think we bought a few different kinds. We did buy a few different kinds, kind of tried those things out to see what kind of worked for me, because previously I was in a physically kind of demanding job, you know. So it needed to kind of ebb and flow with what I did, and we figured out that the metal one was the better way to go, which that's what you prefer anyways.
0:10:24 - Speaker 3
Yeah, so it was a good thing that he also preferred that or that that one actually fit the best, because, I don't know, that would have been a little bit of a. I do very much like the metal over.
0:10:34 - Speaker 4
We can get into the the why of that, because there's a couple of reasons.
0:10:37 - Speaker 3
Well, the metal one is right and our preference also and going into that, that leads into the hygiene and cleaning which is a big part of why we prefer the metal. I mean for physical reasons, I mean there's mental reasons that we prefer the metal also, which we can dive into.
0:10:53 - Speaker 4
But for hygiene and cleaning I think the metal, or you know, like unless you can get a plastic version of the kind that has just the ribs on it open cage. Look, those exist and those are easier to keep yourself clean. The fully enclosed ones, no matter what the material is, those are more different, Right, Right. So you can get yourself clean on a daily basis, which is very, very important.
0:11:20 - Speaker 3
I will say that plastic is probably not a material. Depending on the grade of plastic, plastic can grow bacteria and the only reason I know this is because I did a lot of research when I was looking for anal toys and silicone is really the one of the better materials. If, from my understanding, if you're going to be putting this in places like a silicone is the best for anal play. From what I've seen, unless you have a silicone allergy, then obviously that is not a good idea. But silicone doesn't allow bacteria growth.
0:11:56 - Speaker 4
And there are silicone cages, but they're not necessarily as supportive as you would want to have. The silicone and plastic versions are maybe more towards the occasional wear or maybe the nightly wear or something like that would probably be the best for the silicone and plastic. Now again, it's all personal preference to just saying this from my experience what I would probably use that for.
0:12:28 - Speaker 3
Yes, and I think the metal can cause some pinching. Now I don't remember.
0:12:35 - Speaker 4
I was going to ask just a little bit more than the other two.
0:12:38 - Speaker 3
Yeah, I couldn't remember if you experienced pinching with the silicone one and the no, I mean by nature the silicone.
0:12:46 - Speaker 4
one won't pinch a little bit of a squeeze, if anything, but it won't pinch like a metal, like that's two hard surfaces coming together as with any of them, I suspect.
0:12:58 - Speaker 3
I mean I know we've had to take yours off because the pinching has broken the skin. Now, before I go further with what I was going to say right there, make sure anytime there is a, if there's a scratch, a cut or anything in that skin barrier has been broken, get that all. You don't want the bacteria from you know you don't want to get it infected. So I would suggest if there is a open sore of any variety or an irritation, that you allow that to heal and remove the chastity device. But what I was going to say with the silicone it seems like it would. It would cause more rubbing irritation.
0:13:36 - Speaker 4
Potentially sure, Unless you use like a baby powder situation or something like that or some sort of lube, yep, that might help in that situation.
0:13:44 - Speaker 2
Same.
0:13:45 - Speaker 4
And you know, the environment or the occasion will kind of dictate more what you do, right, if you're just having a night of fun with your partner about things and you want to try a cage, a silicone one is probably the best to do because it'll be the most comfortable and the easiest to work with, right. So that's you know. That's probably a good stepping stone into figuring out hey, I want to try this, but I'm not really sold on the whole works yet. You know, I will tell you an expensive silicone one may be a good first step, yeah.
0:14:22 - Speaker 3
It is a bit tricky to grind on the metal one If that is your forte there is that too. I think we've kind of covered the. You know choosing the cage is going to take some time and try multiple kinds, it's okay that it takes time, yep, and sometimes it maybe it won't take time for everyone.
0:14:40 - Speaker 4
Again, mileage may vary, so maybe you'll snap right into this. See what I did there.
0:14:45 - Speaker 3
Yeah. Maybe you'll snap right into it or lock right into it or click right into it.
0:14:49 - Speaker 4
Yes, exactly, and it'll work fine, and that's totally fine too, and maybe this is going to for some of you, or one of you, or dozens of you, whatever it is, maybe this is going to take a little bit longer, and that's okay too, so there's no reason to sprint into this, you know especially if you want it to be part of your life. You know, take some time and figure it out.
0:15:12 - Speaker 3
I was also going to mention that the one of the biggest adjustments to full time chastity is adjusting to the nighttime erections which you have stated. They get better but they when we had our interview with Judy and Steve, that was lost and makes me want to cry, but we will redo soon. Steve mentioned yeah, steve had mentioned that his don't. They never really went away. He still occasionally gets them.
0:15:41 - Speaker 4
So and that I mean that's just another thing that depends on the person.
0:15:45 - Speaker 3
Everybody is different.
0:15:46 - Speaker 4
For me it seemed that they did go away, you know, a month or two, a month or two into, you know doing the whole he's probably.
0:15:55 - Speaker 3
He's probably scared to get hard. He's probably scared to get hard.
0:15:59 - Speaker 4
Well, that's what I'm saying.
0:16:00 - Speaker 3
He doesn't like to butt his head on the end of that cage. It hurts.
0:16:04 - Speaker 4
That's exactly what it is. I love it, Is that yeah?
0:16:07 - Speaker 3
So I think that kind of really sums up the safety and the physical aspects of safety and chastity. Now let's talk about the mental aspects of chastity. What are some safety things that you can be doing on an emotional level or a relationship level that are important? And, as you all know, communication is key. You need to be open and honest with each other and make sure everybody's emotions are in check, because this may seem like just a physical thing hey, you're just locking up my dick but there are a lot of emotions attached to that specific organ. Is it considered an organ? I think so. Okay, well, we'll go with it If I'm wrong, whatever, you wrong.
Let's not get sassy. I'm just saying I'm about ready to kick in the dick under the table. Regular check-ins are important and you also need to monitor the emotional and physical aspects of Chastity Play. So make sure you're keeping an eye on your partners, or having your partner keep an eye on his own junk to make sure nothing is occurring that would require the Chastity device to be taken off and regular communication, because this can be quite the emotional roller coaster. Absolutely, and back to our choosing metal. We both prefer the metal. I prefer it visually, you prefer it mentally, you enjoy the weight, the weight of it.
0:17:48 - Speaker 4
Yeah, you know, when I'm away from you and I feel that weight, that's the weight of you, in my mind it's you holding it. You know that's what the weight feels like to me. So it's significant because it makes me feel that you are right there with me, no matter whether we're next to each other or miles and miles apart.
0:18:12 - Speaker 2
Yep.
0:18:12 - Speaker 4
So I do enjoy. I prefer that. I prefer it that way.
0:18:16 - Speaker 3
I do enjoy when I have your whole bundle of junk in my hand. We have discussed before, too that, like that Chastity device and my key are so significant to us that I would say it holds the significance of our wedding rings and part of the reason why I'm so upset that it's gone now. Granted, we needed a new cage anyway.
0:18:39 - Speaker 4
We did so we didn't really lose anything.
0:18:41 - Speaker 3
But I've had that necklace almost since the beginning of our Chastity journey, the necklace that the key was on. So I'm very sad about that. However, it was $5 in Vegas, so I guess we have to take a trip back to Vegas For a $5 chain. I know I I couldn't find it last. No, I couldn't find it anyway. Last time we were there I looked for another one to have a backup and I couldn't find it. We've emphasized the safety of cleaning and communication, so we've kind of covered the mental and physical aspects, but let's talk about in case of an emergency.
0:19:22 - Speaker 4
You should absolutely fill from camp.
0:19:25 - Speaker 3
Is what you should yeah he's got a bolt cutters, he will get you out in 2.5 seconds flat. Have a plan in place in case of an emergency. Like I know, when you were having your high blood pressure and high blood pressure issues and heart issues and things like that, I was very, very nervous about you having a heart attack and you having a battle cage on and then they go to use the paddles on you.
0:19:49 - Speaker 4
If something like that happens, something extreme or whatever happens where you know paddles to bring you back to life may be a case, you might want to tell the people what's going on.
0:20:00 - Speaker 3
Yeah.
0:20:01 - Speaker 4
You know and listen. I'm sure they've seen all things in hospitals, so your cock cage is not going to be a life moment for them probably.
0:20:12 - Speaker 3
Right? Well, and they're focused on saving your life, so just make sure that you have a plan in place, do I mean? Most Chastity devices come with two keys, so you need to determine what works best for your relationship. Keep a spare, yeah, and where that spare is kept, and does the locked party know where it is, or is it top secret?
0:20:33 - Speaker 4
Well, again, that depends on the relationship and what you two decide as the best practice for that situation.
0:20:40 - Speaker 3
And, just like having a fire in your house, you should have a exit strategy planned in case of an emergency. So I mean, I don't know that you need to practice it, but you sure could if you wanted to, but make sure you have a way to release him if needed. So I think that about covers all of the safety. We've talked about cleaning. We've talked about emergency. We've talked about emotional communication. Is there anything else you'd like to add, since you're the one that would normally be locked in Chastity?
0:21:20 - Speaker 4
I would say I would just like to you know, the overall thing about Chastity is it's a commitment that you're making to each other, it's something that you're sharing with each other. It's it can be an amazing, amazing, amazing thing. And again, it's not for everybody, and that's okay to you know. Work together as a couple through this Chastity situation and find all the best practices that work for you as a couple, whether it's you know routines or types, or you know how often all these things work this out and communicate with each other that way and get things settled so that there are no questions down the road or there are no difficulties. And guess what? You may run into something that you don't foresee. So just talk about it.
0:22:11 - Speaker 3
I would like to talk about something really quickly that was brought up in the ladies group by the newest addition to our ladies group, who is so fucking awesome. But she had said do you have to have a Chastity device to participate in Chastity? And I think that is a fucking awesome question. Now that relies heavily on the honor system.
And if you have those open lines of communication and that trust and that solid foundation, I don't see any reason why it couldn't exist. And I thought that that nobody has ever asked me that question before and I think that's awesome. Would that be considered Chastity or Organism Denial? And I mean it would be. She's essentially in control of when he comes.
0:23:00 - Speaker 4
Chastity is. It can be a state of mind, you know first. So yes, of course it could, and I think we probably had comments and questions on social media about people saying do you need this or whatever, and so I guess the answer to that would be yeah, you could totally do it without one, but to your point, there has to be that trust between each other and that transparency, so sure.
0:23:29 - Speaker 3
So that ties in too. If you are wanting to participate in this or in a Chastity situation and you have health issues that don't allow you, this could absolutely be attainable. So I just thought that just popped into my head and I thought that that was. It was such a good question, that was such a good conversation, so I just wanted to throw that out there for anybody who's listening who maybe isn't comfortable. Or or maybe you start out your Chastity journey without the actual device and just have the conversation and figure out how it would work for your relationship and then go from there and then, if it decides to evolve into a Chastity device situation, fantastic. Well, I think that's it, Unless you have anything else to add. You added your, your thoughts.
0:24:19 - Speaker 4
No, I'm good.
0:24:21 - Speaker 3
He's going to go to sleep.
0:24:22 - Speaker 4
We could talk lots about this.
0:24:23 - Speaker 3
Yes, we could.
0:24:25 - Speaker 4
Again, our communication is open as well. If you want to get ahold of either one of us about any questions or comments about something, we're always open to that sort of thing.
0:24:35 - Speaker 3
And I forgot to mention this in housekeeping, and this can be in closing, as we wrap up, I would like to reiterate again that if you are a member of my Patreon or interested in joining, the first tier is now, starting November one, going to be $10 a month and that gets you access to my Patreon and it's just kind of life updates and little bits and pieces about what's going on with us. If you're interested in that, it gains you access to the ladies group, but I would also really enjoy getting to know you a little better. So I'm going to change the other two tiers that we do have to $25 and $50. $25 a month gets you everything that the $10 tier gets you and it also gets you a 30 minute video or phone conversation that month and you get one each month. That's what you get. And then the $50 tier will get you a 60 minute phone or video conversation and if you want to see what that would look like, or you know if you're intimidated by what would we talk about for 60 minutes, I am on Owwll. If you use and it's Owwll if you use code FLR, you get a $10 sign up bonus. The app is free and we can have a 10 minute conversation that costs a dollar. So you can have that conversation with me just to get an idea and, if you want more, and you can keep it through OwwllL too, whatever you prefer. But I would really like to get to know you and I would love to chat with people. And I always have to put this disclaimer Owwll and the Patreon Neither one of those are a phone text.
It's more of a consulting. This isn't anything like my erotic stories. This is just if you want some advice or if you need an ear to vent to about something or whatever. That's what those avenues are for and I think that's it. So I hope you have a fantastic week. I hope you are enjoying October. If you are participating, we are not. Well, stay healthy, be kind, be a good human and don't steal other people's shit. Have a fantastic, fantastic week, love you.
0:26:44 - Speaker 1
Thank you so much for listening today. I genuinely appreciate your time. If you happen to have any questions, all of my contact information is in the show notes of this and every episode. Don't hesitate to reach out. Also in the show notes there is a link to my Patreon, where your support is incredibly appreciated.